


A Study in Human Sexuality, By Jean Kirstein

by Brice_Gottlieb



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Annie and Reiner are Half-Siblings, Bertholdt can't control his inner nerd, How rare is that?, Kind of a Barista AU?, No Angst, Reiner dances a lot to pop songs while on the job, Slice of Life, and Jean just wants to finish his Psycology 323 homework
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-28
Updated: 2014-11-02
Packaged: 2018-02-22 22:52:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2524652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brice_Gottlieb/pseuds/Brice_Gottlieb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reiner Braun liked four things: catchy music, Bertholdt Hoover, cats, and baking.</p><p>He has a full iPod, homemade cookies for lunch, and an stray named Norma.</p><p>It's the Bertholdt part that's so difficult.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Spoopy

**Author's Note:**

> This Modern AU is going to be crazy; music references are going to be dropped all over the place and the timeline might not make 100% sense, but I'll try my best by keeping it vague and only describing by season. Everyone is roughly college age (19-23) and rating may change depending on how much love this fic gets/how heavy the fic gets. 
> 
> Guaranteed 100% Angst Free.
> 
> Not sure if I'll update often or finish it, though.

October was in full swing and the air smelled of pumpkin spice. Reeked of it might be a better description. It seeped into work aprons and after-hour hands, no matter how many times you washed them. The employees of Café Sína had been dreading it all August, but the inevitable came, as did a large shipment of flavoring. Between Maria Walls University and the constant barrage of office workers, they had their work cut out for them. Armin was never very easily frazzled as a manager, but the autumn months were enough to put more than a few hairs out of place. The stress was worked off in various ways: Connie and Sasha competed in races when the busiest hours hit, Marco conversed with customers as he took orders, Annie took stabs of joy by spelling even the simplest of names wrong on every cup, and Reiner took control of the usually ambient music.

 

It was October and Reiner refused to take Spooky Scary Skeletons off the in-house speakers.

 

The business hour faded quickly, leaving only a smattering of university students too deeply involved in phone screens to 'appreciate' the blonde's choice in music. Armin and Marco's patience was a blessing, but Annie groaned repeatedly through counter clean-up and made every effort to either trip Reiner as he danced on by or shut the speakers off entirely. Her efforts were only met with smacks to the hand. 

 

"It's not even close to Halloween yet!" she complained after a long bout of silent fuming. A few snickers could be heard across the dining area, a couple of heads turning to look at the commotion. Given the audience, Reiner kept swaying to the jolly beat. "I put up with this every single year; I can't take it!" Tearing at her apron (or as it was known at this time of year, the pumpkin protector) Annie made to physically remove Reiner from the controls. Armin rushed to hold her back, Reiner braced for impact, Connie was already taking bets, and a customer cleared his throat at the counter.

 

The kitchen paused. The new patron began to shy back at the attention. He was tall, tanned considering the season, and most definitely handsome. 

 

Reiner was in love.

 

"What?" Annie snapped, already tying back her apron and readying her Sharpie. Muttering, the newcomer ordered a hazelnut macchiato as his cup was sent down the line and as he waited, Reiner began to catalog. The blue sweater was worn and well-loved, a splotch of orange on each sleeve adorned with black buttons making tiny jack-o-lanterns. Underneath, the slightly askew collar of a sky blue button up peeked as he pulled habitually at the sweater. Ash grey slack, hand-me-down office shoes, and a messenger bag over the shoulder gave the boy a definite nearly-late-for-class look. He passed over crumpled bills and spare change easily and took up his cup from Connie's hand.

 

Reiner caught his green eyes and smiled. 

 

What a dumb song to fall in love to.

 

Annie used the moment to her advantage, slapping the 'off' button on the radio as late-for-class boy began leaving, looking over his shoulder at Reiner. It could have been a tale for romance novels everywhere, except for the glass door. He had to bite back laughter as the boy ran right into the door without thinking to open it first. The accident could have been made better had the cup spilled and prompted Reiner rush to clean the spill, but the lid held firmly in place and the boy fumbled with the handle in embarassment and disappeared outside without a backward glance. Something about it had been, dare Reiner say it, cute.

 

He was most definately in love.


	2. The Name

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you know, I'm not honestly putting a lot of effort into this. It's not quite crack, but this is just a bunch of funny scenes I daydream up. If I get a lot of attention, I might revise for length and description and actually put effort in, but I think for something I'm just tossing out and carrying a story loosely through, you'd get the picture. 
> 
> It is kind of a warm up for a Jean/Marco I've got planned (and will put effort into), but let's leave it at that.

"What's his name?"

Looking over her shoulder, Annie smirked. Two days and the late-for-class boy had yet to return. Wasn't the love interest supposed to come back every day as a regular patron after locking eyes with his future husband-to-be?

"Why d'you wanna know?" she asked lightly, finishing off the iced black tea in her hands and passing it off quickly to a nearby customer who smelled heavily of B.O. Connie rushed between them in an effort to sanitize the counter the second he left. "Why do you think I want to know?" Reiner cut back, taking out his growing frustration on the metal countertop he'd been assigned to scrub. Annie smirked in response, jotting down the next customer's name ("Gabbie, with an I-E.") and purposely adding a Y. "You don't want him," she stated simply, starting up on the latest order as she spoke. "Why?"

"Your rules to dating a guy."

Reiner grew concerned instantly. Late-For-Class couldn't be a felon, he looked much too innocent for that. There were obviously no frosted tips on that adorably tousled brown hair. 

"Oh no," he exclaimed, turning on heel in shock. Annie fought her smile while Reiner put on his distraught damsel act. "Don't tell me..." Reiner uttered, disbelief across his features as he turned he face away, a hand to his chest. "He's married, isn't he?"

"No, brother," Annie called out, "worse!" She cut across the kitchen, taking Reiner's arm as if to stable him through swooning. 

"Worse than married? Sister, you don't mean...!"

"Yes," she replied finally, "he has a bad name."

Connie groaned, shoving the two the short distance back to their workstations as the siblings laughed. "How bad are we talking?" Sasha called from food prep station, earning a shove of her own from Connie when he took up the baking beside her. 

"Bert."

The kitchens collectively groaned. "You spelled it wrong too, didn't you?" Reiner accused, going back to his scrubbing. "Hey, you'd be thanking me." Annie rounded on her brother, pouring out raspberry iced tea for Gabbie with an I-E. "Can you imagine calling out the name Bert in bed? I'd start calling you Ernie, and then you can ruin childhood for everyone." Another collective groan, this time of disgust, but Reiner shook his head. "Bert and Ernie are already gay, so that argument is invalid." Reiner countered, bumping hips with her. With swift recovery, Annie purposely poured onto the countertop.

"You missed a spot."

\-------

Soon after, Reiner made sure to conquer the in-house speakers for four long hours of Spooky Scary Skeletons.

The pumpkin spice latte he snuck into her car helped his mood as well, and she'd be smelling it for weeks.


End file.
